SCP Foundation

A new tale, the first from me for a pretty substantial amount of time. I think it's a rather neat experiment in narrative, and I hope you all enjoy it.

Special thanks to all those who helped review this and to Silber for inspiring the name.

Very neat imagining and take on both Oneiroi and the Chaos Insurgency. Good shit.

I almost downvoted at that awful, awful dialogue in the last section. But the end made it worth it.

This did NOT go where I expected it to go.

It's so meta it hurts

Pretty good. It would annoy me if it wasn't so well written, but I hope this is a one off and not some new theme because clever for the sake of clever can wear out its welcome quickly.

But +1.

The Chaos Insurgency has only ever existed to make the plot go forward. This is the best way it could go, as far as I'm concerned.

Brilliant, just brilliant.

Wait, what? My brain hurts.

While I'm not sure how to feel about Oneiroi being a single entity for the purposes of my own interpretation of them, I think this is far more interesting than their usual depiction. Plus that half-meta look at CI is just… ah, man, I love it.

Very good shit, Dmatix.

All but the last scene suffers terribly from wall of text syndrome. You really need to break those monster paragraphs up; that can work stylistically, but here, it doesn't.

It's also overwritten. I suspect you were purple-prose-ing on purpose, but you overplayed that hand.

That aside… the payoff was worth it.

That whole last scene made up for most of the issues. I also liked the take on Oneiroi. This is, overall, well done and entertaining. +1'd

Pity. from what i gathered on oneiroi, it is a hive mind entity, isn't it? That said this could have been a perfect tale of its origin. Upon feeding on its very first victim it would realise it is little affected by it. being good for the hive mind aspect.
To be honest i had a good read even through a lot of text, untill the last dialog. which was confusing for me and absolutely missed its meaning :(
So far novote.