I'm probably missing the context because I have no idea what this is referencing (if anything), but about the first half of this was boring, plain description with no real action. I get that the rock war itself is pretty boring, but I shouldn't have to be bored reading about it. If you had given a example of the battles up front instead of vaguely introducing the creators and then describing all the rock tribes, or at least introduced the rock "characters" along with the bland tribe descriptions, at least something would be happening.
The politicking and Nevryn in the later parts were pretty entertaining, and the details about the tribe trying to fall on people were amusing, but ultimately nothing about the core concept (the rock war) formed a particularly compelling mental image.
If this is a retelling of an article or something somewhere else, it doesn't stand on its own.
-1… It was looking like no vote, but if I don't give a crap about the central image I can't say this particularly justifies itself.
