If you've got this far; thanks for reading!
I'm completely open to any criticism, although I may be slow to respond; life things.
EDIT: Being the ungrateful type that I am, I forgot to thank those who helped make this readable. Thanks go to shaggydredlocks and another in the IRC. Sorry for forgetting your name, another. I should really get a system. You guys made me start to believe in this piece. It wouldn't have happened without you. (Seriously: if you can remind me of the your name I'll give you top billing in the thanks.)
Thanks also to MrWrong and Quantum Physician in the forums. MrWrong was harsh, but fair and I needed some of that. Quantum Physician was nicer but didn't shy away from pointing out what needed pointing out. I needed some of that too.