SCP Foundation

I like this.

Now I know throwing away those black "Chuckles" is the right thing to do.

Would Abel be vulnerable to this thing? What counts as his 'birthday'? Does resurrection reset this thing's birthday-detector? (Yes, I think he'd be interested in trying - it's a challenge. "Can you sing well enough to satisfy this SCP? If you can't, you lose a year of your life! Again and again and again!")

What if you were born on February 29, and you're given the Birthday Monkey on March 1 and it's not a leap year? Are you safe?

I'd be interested in more information (perhaps in another addendum or a separate testing log) about the various types of candy produced and their effects. The Foundation would absolutely have fed that black candy to a D-Class, just to see what happened (though the result might have been [DATA EXPUNGED]).

Original idea, and has potential for some nice test logs. +1

Definitely well-written, and agreed with Richard, should be some testing done with that candy.

Ah, my favorite things. Monkeys and mysteries.

I love how, instead of hypnotizing anyone to use it, the siren call comes from the possibility that you can outsing the monkey and get years added to your life.

Edit: UNTIL THE EXPLODING LIGHT ANYWAY :O

I like it, but I'm reserving my upvote for tone reasons. As it stands, it's a little flowery.

A RING DING DING DING IT’S YOUR BIRTHDAY!

…Sorry. Couldn't resist. It's just one of those phrases that are somehow inherently catchy. Remind me to say it seventy million times next time I go to the chat room.

Seriously though, where the hell did the idea for this thing come from? And what would happen if you use this in conjunction with SCP-559?

The ringdingdingding bit reminded me of the sketch from Monty Python where he's at the interview.

However, I like this article. Otherwise mundane things that fuck up your shit.

Upvoted.