SCP Foundation

With thanks to:

MrWrong
Modern_Erasmus
Dr0Shadow
bitter

I tried to edit more faithfully according to the suggestions and criticisms of my critiquers this time; hopefully this will have paid off.

They've got the horse right here.

The paragraph about Humes almost made me reach for the downvote button - and the sentence about the organisms living in the dimension absolutely does not belong there - but I stuck it out and enjoyed the journey through the desert in between the worlds.

The link's wrong—it says 2865, but it goes to 2895.
Otherwise, fantastic job. +1

Still pondering whether I like this enough to upvote, but I have to salute this:

and the use of a species of singing cactus as a form of public entertainment

Do they still have Mondays off?

This is surprisingly well done. The anomaly itself didn't caught me but it was well written that I still upvoted. +1

Oh hey, didn't expect to see this posted so quick!

I really have no further comments beyond what I told you in chat- the method by which they enter the dimension is very unique, the descriptions of the organisms and events was a blast and really made the universe feel more fleshed-out, and all in all it was a lovely ride. +1

I'm very glad to have had my small part in helping this succeed. Very, very good work. :^)

For the record, I still think that a mass transport would be more suitable and manageable (although that would align more to a 'settlement' theme, as opposed to an 'exploration' theme).

Notably, this means that the MTFs involved have to learn how to get on horses they can't touch.

From the first line of the description and up on through the table describing the MTF's findings, I was blown away by how remarkably well-crafted this world is. This earned an upvote five time over (though, I'm of the opinion that the Humes nonsense is unnecessary, it can just be odd and working by on its own set of logic).

I think there's some improvement to be had still in Swan's character development/arc. The first interview with herself seems like more exposition on the setting than establishing who she is as a character. This issue seems to continue into the next log as well, so by the ending, I'm at a loss as to what she's doing, where she intends to go, what's motivating her, and why anything she's doing matters in the slightest. It's thus very hard for me to get invested in her journey or care about her, and had I not been so enthralled by the setting, I'd have downvoted for this.

potatolos

I thought you were joking.

Apparently not.

In all seriousness, I have to echo Shaggy's statement above - the worldbuilding is fantastic and really immersive. Great job! +1 :D