Alright author, let's see what we have here…
Ok so there are numerous tone and wording issues with this piece, but I'm just going to point out a few :
- "SCP-XXXX is to be kept in a glass room roughly 30 feet3 and 4 inches thick which is to be suspended in another room 70 feet3 i"n site-██." - SCPF is a formal, scientific organization. This means that they use metric, not imperial units.
- "When the strings are not held together the balloons release their gas and float around, but they never get to far from each other" the term "float around" is not a fairly casual way to word this. I would suggest rewording this as simply "When the strings are not held together, the balloons will float as normal, but remain with [insert distance here] of each other" or something to that effect.
- "SCP-XXXX-1, SCP-XXXX-2, and SCP-XXXX-3 are all aware of their surroundings" How are you able to differentiate this from just being attracted to people? Do they communicate?
- "Attempts so far to touch the balloons directly have all resulted in death through [REDACTED]." But why? Not from an in-universe perspective, but from a narrative perspective. How does this enhance the story? Redacted the information here also comes off as lazy.
As for the overall concept, as far as I can tell these are just really dangerous balloons. But there's no narrative, no reasoning, or anything else for the reader to grasp onto. Modern SCP articles are not just descriptions of anomalous objects, they're stories told about said objects, molded to a specific format. Right now, you give the reader very little reason to care about your balloons, because there's no story presented.
I suggest you post a short summary of you idea on Ideas and Brainstorming, and wait to get this idea flushed out and the approval of others before you take another crack at the draft again.
Good luck!
