Hi, author. Let's see what we've got.
Line by line:
The individual must enter Bishop's Glen from geographic north. Moving faster than what would commonly be considered "walking" will upset the required conditions.
The individual must then walk for at least thirty continuous minutes within the park; direction is irrelevant.
Pretty sure the sentence I underlined would flow better if it went after "irrelevant" rather than "north."
At this point, running or sprinting is allowed.
I don't like the use of the word "allowed" here. Not sure what I would replace it with. Maybe "will still trigger the same effects?"
Overall:
Dude, this is creepy and great and I love it. Honestly, I can't suggest too much outside of the cosmetic changes I talked about in my LBL. This made me feel genuinely uncomfortable at the end, and though I more or less knew how it would go about two thirds of the way through, I can't say that played to its detriment — the length helped here.
I get a sense of what happened, but I don't get the whole story, which I'm a huge fan of as well.
There's really only one suggestion I would make — I don't like how stereotypical "Chef's knife (bloodstained)" feels, and I think this would probably benefit from some more interesting and less obvious murder method.
Anyways, yeah, I like this and I would upvote. Good job, comrade.
