rating: +20+x

Item #: SCP-3955

Object Class: Neutralized

Special Containment Procedures: The remains of SCP-3955, related artifacts, and a single instance of SCP-3955-1 are stored in Archival Locker 18, Vault 3, Reliquary Storage Site-41. Standard procedure for artifact study remains in effect.

Description: SCP-3955 was a bipedal, sapient humanoid, with superficial deviations from modern humans including: an abnormal level of body hair; a squat, exaggerated body shape; an enlarged cranial structure along the occipital bone; and a preternaturally dense musculature. Subject was 1.45 meters in height, and weighed 168.63 kg. Examinations following Incident 3955-3 (see Addendum I) showed true biological deviations from baseline human physiology. SCP-3955 possessed an apparent redundant digestive organ located in close proximity to the appendix, which also showed high levels of activity and function; tissue samples of skeletal muscle showing an acute compacting of the sarcomere1 have been postulated to account for the extreme density. Further testing was rendered impossible due to termination of the instance on 2013/01/27.

SCP-3955 was a resident of Portland, Oregon, USA, identifying as Markus Robinson; no records exist of such a person prior to their arrival in Portland in 2002. SCP-3955 is believed to be indirectly responsible for the distribution of SCP-3955-1 to various retailers throughout the Pacific Northwest.

SCP-3955-1 is designed to resemble a wrist-worn personal fitness tracker; objects are composed of a solid block of polystyrene 40.1 mm x 25 mm x 19.2 mm adhered by methyl 2-cyanoacrylate2 to an adjustable, woven nylon band. Stylized characters ("FITBiT") are stamped onto the surface, with the tittle3 replaced by an isosceles triangle. Aside from the band, objects possess no functional components.

Packaging was printed with the ("FITBiT") stylization and the following text:

Instant Weight Loss!!
Wear 23/7/356!!
Never Exercise Again!!
Best Shape You'll Ever BE!!

Contents included a single instance, and an eighteen-page Terms of Service document printed in standard size 2 monospaced font; the majority of the text, entirely in American English, presented typical liability waivers and acceptance of use, redundantly rephrased. The notable excerpt follows:

("FITBiT") guarantees health and vitality of the user for entire duration of use. Duration of use not guaranteed by ("FITBiT"). By using ("FITBiT"), you are agreeing to relinquish ownership of all unused relative duration proceeding termination of ("FITBiT") usage to Markus Robinson {RTCT/3-4s391.34}. ("FITBiT") reserves the right to terminate use at any time.

No production or distribution source was found; employees and records of affected businesses showed no arrangements regarding the acquisition of SCP-3955-1 instances.

Addendum I - Classification Summary: Field agents monitoring emergency services communications in the Pacific Northwest noted the deaths of 157 individuals on 2012/12/28. Autopsy reports indicated a universal time of death between 0300 and 0330 FST, with 142 cases ruled as cardiac arrest, 12 cases as previously undetected severe colo-rectal cancer, and 3 listed as "natural causes." Foundation investigation of 63 cases confirmed these findings, though the decedents were noted to have possessed marked physical conditioning and otherwise exemplary health; anomalous activity was not considered at the time. This event is now classified as Incident 3955-1.

On 2013/01/10, emergency services reported 3,213 instances of death with similar ubiquitous timing as the previous event. MTF Zeta-95 ("Disciples of John") was mobilized under Misinformation Protocol IMOC-2 ("Misplaced Resources"), with the initial goal of isolation and containment of potentially affected persons, preceding investigations to identify probable anomalous cause. This event is now classified as Incident 3955-2.

Within twelve hours, correlation between ownership of SCP-3955-1 and death had been established. Affected living persons were administered Class B amnestics and standard retraining cognitohazard devices; further resources were granted to Zeta-95, and personnel were retasked to collect all distributed instances, as well as locate Markus Robinson, designated at this time as PoI-1524316.

On 2013/01/12, personnel at the Multnomah County Inverness Jail requested immediate medical aid; twenty-six of the thirty-eight staff members had collapsed, apparently deceased. A unit of MTF Zeta-95 arrived on-scene sixteen minutes later. Deceased persons uniformly possessed instances of SCP-3955-1. Booking records showed a Markus Robinson had been arrested approximately six hours prior to the event; PoI-1524316 was taken into custody, and remained under sedation during examination and decontamination proceedings. Containment was facilitated by 1046 FST, and standard retraining administered. This event is now classified as Incident 3955-3.

Over the course of investigation, 10,800 instances of SCP-3955-1 were discovered, with 8,421 having been purchased; 500 were located in the apartment of SCP-3955. An initial release of 300 instances appeared in Portland on 2012/06/10, with retailers possessing no records of their arrival or anticipated release; a subsequent distribution of 10,000 instances had appeared with similar apparent spontaneity on 2012/11/23, affecting retailers in Portland, as well as in Seattle, WA and Los Angeles, CA. Detailed purchase records were readily available, as the cost of the objects ($3,900 - $4,250 USD) generally precluded the use of physical currency.

Upon finding only the noted physiological traits, and detecting no apparent anomalous ability, SCP-3955 was allowed to emerge from anesthesia on 2013/01/19, and was detained in a standard humanoid containment chamber in Site-64. SCP-3955 requested representation by the firm of Steven, Steven, and Stephen4, refusing subsequent attempts at communication; subject likewise refused all food and water, for a period lasting until 2013/01/26. No detrimental effects of this fast were noted

At 0914 FST, 2013/01/26, SCP-3955 became extremely hostile, violently assaulting the viewing pane for six minutes before coming to an abrupt stop.

<Begin Audio Log, Incident 3955-4>

Use of the device constituted acceptance of the enclosed terms of service documentation. You have not allowed me fair and proper representation, nor have you presented evidence of violation of the terms of service agreement by [unintelligible]5. I exercise the authority granted to me as executor thereof.

Researchers investigating an instance of SCP-3955-1 detected a tachyon flux of 0.03 Watts/m4 centered on the object. Simultaneously, emergency services channels began reporting numerous instances of apparent cardiac arrest throughout affected areas.

Dr. Laurel Armstrong, Site-64, Asst. Director of Psychiatric Research:
I understand your concerns, but so far you have refused to communicate with our staff; we can't very well help you if you won't let us…Markus, is it?

SCP-3955 responds rapidly in the unknown language for twenty-two seconds, ceasing communication as aerosolized trichloromethane is pumped into the containment chamber, following the breach.

<End Log>

SCP-3955 was moved to Isolation Chamber Alpha-7, and anesthesia was maintained as a temporary containment measure while further procedures were developed. Containment breach resulted in 4,816 civilian fatalities; widespread disbursal of Class-A amnestics was authorized at 1422 FST and concluded at 1719; Media Retraining Protocol 12-D was broadcast at 2345.

The final instance of SCP-3955-1 was confirmed in custody at 1035 FST the following day. At 1117, SCP-3955 emerged from anesthesia despite continued maintenance, and attacked attending personnel, crushing the larynx of Junior Researcher Philip Goldman. SCP-3955 was approximately twelve meters from the entrance of the chamber when it stumbled; video feed showed an onset of aging, apparent death, and rapid decomposition over 0.084 seconds, resulting in skeletal remains, many of which sustained major damage upon impact with the floor. Instruments independently monitoring forty instances of SCP-3955-1 detected a tachyon flux of 16.124 W/m4 uniform across all samples. Simultaneously, the following document appeared on the remains; video feed showed no method of delivery, with the note appearing between frames of footage.

Markus Robinson {RTCT/3-4s391.34}

Termination of your contract has been noted. We regret that you were ultimately dissatisfied with our services; in the future, please take advantage of the ample opportunities we provide to review documentation prior to acceptance.

Per your instructions, remaining durations may be distributed to your immediate relatives; simply provide them with the device.

We thank you for your business, and hope that you will choose us again in the future.

Steven, Steven, and Stephens
Temporal Contingency Agency

Baseline-normative dating techniques indicated the remains of SCP-3955 to be 158,800±275 years old. Continued monitoring of SCP-3955-1 instances was ordered.

Addendum 2: Foundation Paleontology Department Senior Researcher Sylvia Hernandez noted the similarities between SCP-3955 and the "Herto Man" remains discovered by Dr. Tim White, et. al., in Herto Bouri, Ethiopia; subsequent analysis confirmed a genetic match. All known Homo sapiens idaltu remains were brought to Foundation custody and replaced by facsimiles.

Addendum 3: HMCL Supervisory Committee classified SCP-3955 Neutralized on 2020/10/10. Non-archived SCP-3955-1 instances are scheduled for destruction on 2021/03/22.

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