SCP-4451
rating: +89+x
dadofinal

Photograph of SCP-4451, posted by dado

Special Containment Procedures: All 47 known instances of SCP-4451 are to be kept in a secure underground ordnance bunker. All testing on SCP-4451 must take place on Site-20's artillery range or its adjacent facilities.

Description: SCP-4451 is the collective designation for 47 autonomous vacuum cleaners, out of an original production run of 50, manufactured by the Person of Interest known as "dado". All 47 contained instances are in their original packaging and have not been activated or opened by Foundation personnel. The boxes containing SCP-4451 are made of cardboard and covered with illegible writing and the name "dado" prominently displayed on the front.

Each box also features a passable sketch of one of the 50 states that comprise the United States of America and what appears to be the Gadsden Flag. All instances of SCP-4451 utilized for testing will be referred to by the state listed on the box for clarity.

During the initial examination of SCP-4451-Nevada, a switch was discovered on the top of the vacuum, crudely attached with medical gauze and tape. This switch is togglable and displays three options: "Normal", "Off", and "Turbo". When set to "Normal," SCP-4451-Nevada moved in a manner consistent with other autonomous vacuum and never surpassed 1 kilometer per hour. However, when set to "Turbo", SCP-4451-Nevada was capable of exceeding speeds of 180 kilometers per hour. After 270 consecutive laps around Site-20's test track, SCP-4451-Nevada broke through a barrier and was subsequently destroyed by drones.

To better understand the anomaly, SCP-4451-Maine was disassembled for internal examination. The subject was found to be almost entirely consistent with the material components and manufacturing processes of the consumer robotics company, iRobot. However, rather than containing the standard lithium-ion battery, a collection of unknown pills, designated SCP-4451-1, were inserted into this slot and held together by a gel later identified as Vick's Vapo-Rub.

cursed

A sample of SCP-4451-1 being used to charge a researcher's cell phone, despite hardware differences.

When removed from SCP-4451-Maine, SCP-4451-1 began to emit extremely high levels of radiation, with over 3,600 Gray (360,000 Roentgens) being recorded over the course of ten minutes.1 SCP-4451-Maine was promptly reassembled and radioactivity ceased immediately.

After the standard radiation clean up protocols had been enacted, SCP-4451-Maine was powered on. It did not emit any radiation and wandered the testing room for approximately 37 days before being powered off by Foundation Staff.

During SCP-4451-Maine's reassembly, a design flaw was noticed in the battery housing of the vacuum. Models of SCP-4451 were constructed, and testing showed that if pressure was applied to the top of the vacuum, it has the potential to compress SCP-4451-1. Because of the instability of SCP-4451-1 as a fuel source, Foundation Personnel concluded this could turn the entire construct into an extremely powerful landmine.

All instances of SCP-4451 function as normal vacuums.


SCP-4451 Test-01:

Test Subject SCP-4451-Maine

Foreword: Initial attempt to gauge SCP-4451's reactivity to pressure.

<Begin Log>

Doctor Ganymede: Alright, this is Test-01 for SCP-4451, specifically SCP-4451-Maine. We've placed ourselves in a bunker about 2 kilometers away from the instance and we're planning to detonate it by drone. Are the cameras ready, Jones?

Dr. Jones: Yep, got them pulled up on the monitors.

Dr. Ganymede: Alright, send in Gatsby.

Video Footage shows a simple humanoid robot approaching SCP-4451-Maine, which is contained within a 10 centimeter tall corral.

Dr. Ganymede: Let's start with 2 kilos of pressure.

No noticeable effect is observed from SCP-4451-Maine.

Dr. Ganymede: Increase pressure to 2.5 kilos.

No noticeable effect is observed from SCP-4451-Maine.

Dr. Ganymede: Increase pressure to 3 kilos.

No noticeable effect is observed from SCP-4451-Maine.

Dr. Ganymede: This is killing me. Bump it up by 2 kilos. Let's see wh-

<End Log>

Closing Statement: Staff were treated for light ocular damage. The explosion of SCP-4451-Maine generated 4.5 kilotons of power.

Due to the unpredictable nature of other creations by dado, all instances of SCP-4451 were moved to its current holding site at the edge of Site-20's campus.


Discovery Log:

SCP-4451 was discovered at 3 am on Sept. 21, 2011, after an explosion occurred at the mansion of John Hartwick, a pharmaceutical billionaire and anti-government advocate. Following a Foundation investigation, a printed email and handwritten letter were discovered in the glovebox of Hartwick's car, crudely stapled together.

From: John Hartwick <JWick@hartwick,com>
To: dado <inquiry@promethues,lab>
Subject: Interest in a Product
Message:

To whom it may concern,

My name is John Hartwick, CEO of Hartwick Pharmaceuticals, and I'm looking to acquire a "special" type of domestic servant robot. Something a little more advanced than what's on the market, if you catch my drift… Price is not an issue.

John Hartwick

helo, it is dado

dado will respond to ur email. dado thinks u messaged dado in error. perhap u mean pro meth use labs, but i understand, dado has many emails. as fine business owner and capitalist, dado still deliver good product. i do quality products, u trust dado, mr. yohn hotwick

u want a robot that clean? good good i have answer. meet tsar roomba by dado. (tsar is russel king. funny because king doesn't clean. dado has good jokes. also have laundromat, so dado clean too)

what makes tsar roomba special? dado has more answers. tsar roomba is speed. cleans house like snapped fingers. bing! it is done. flying fast like shooting tsar. (does not drift though. dado apologize)

how does robot get power u ask? dado traveled to cherry noble to make special pills in the ellie plant's foot. very dangerous so i only made 50, one for each the states.

dado is not as good of an engineer as parapharmaceuticalist, in fact, tsar roomba is dado's first try but dado is very proud of tsar roomba

dado is happy to hear from another medicine maker. perhap we swap learning sometime, no?

if u desire more dado products, check dado's etsy.

trust dado. tsar roomba is very extremely safe long as warning followed

warning: as u libertarians say, "no steppy". tsar roomba does not like.

dado no lie able for damage or in jury


The Foundation purchased the remaining 49 SCP-4451 instances from dado's page on the online market "Etsy" after this note was found. The Foundation also acquired 5 complimentary instances of "stapler by dado", which is a nonanomalous wooden mallet that comes with a sandwich bag of loose staples.

The page has been allowed to remain active for the purpose of monitoring the PoI's activity, but civilian access is restricted. No further posts have been made to this website.

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