SCP-4759
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rating: +87+x
untoothers.jpg

A donut recovered from SCP-4759-A

Item #: SCP-4759

Object Class: Keter

Special Containment Procedures: Existing Foundation elements in state governments are to monitor for SCP-4759 manifestations and discredit it during deliberations. Donut shops in affected areas are to be surveilled for SCP-4759-A.

As of 03/10/2017, state legislators are to be investigated for any connections to bakeries and bread distributors.

Description: SCP-4759 are anomalous additions to existing bills being considered by state legislatures. SCP-4759 instances are usually between 10,000 and 120,000 words and consist almost entirely of nonsensical words and phrases, with the exception of a single section that describes a "donut tax" in great detail and specificity.

The donut tax bill imposes a sales tax of 10-90% on all donuts and related food items and products, as well as a heavier tax on the overall profits of small businesses which sell donuts. Legislators reviewing SCP-4759 will regard the document as non-anomalous, and discuss the tax as they would any other.

Legislators in support of SCP-4759 will suffer insomnia, persistent nightmares, and develop a severe flour allergy.

Occasionally, a legislator that supports the tax will be accosted by a figure instantly manifesting near their location. This figure, designated SCP-4759-A, resembles a humanoid armed with a lance and mounted on a horse, and is composed entirely of compressed donuts. (Local stores report the sudden disappearance of large amounts of donuts during SCP-4759-A manifestations.)

SCP-4759-A will vocalize through unknown means and challenge the legislator to single combat, with the condition that should SCP-4759-A win, the legislator must attempt to stop the passing of SCP-4759. If the legislator declines, SCP-4759-A will continue to reappear on subsequent days until they acquiesce.

To date, the combined actions of the Foundation and SCP-4759-A have managed to prevent SCP-4759 from being passed into law.

Addendum: On 03/09/2017, SCP-4759-A attempted to battle Alabama Senator Vivian Davis Figures due to the latter's extremely vocal support for the bill. Upon being struck by SCP-4759-A's lance, Senator Figures' skin was pierced; she removed it and revealed herself to be composed entirely of bagels. Senator Figures won the duel and fled the scene, and has not been located since. Cover Story 119-L ("Golfing Accident") was employed. SCP-4759-A has continued its appearances.

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