Uraniumempire's Personnel File
rating: +47+x

Name: Eleanor U███████ Empira

Occupation: IT Technician

Clearance level: null okay fuck you guys give me my key card already


+68 37
Latest comment: UraniumEmpire at 24 Jul 2020 18:15
Last edited: Elogee FishTruck at 17 Mar 2020 23:25

Info Cut, cut! What are you, amateurs? Check out more of my articles here! SCP-1285. Photograph taken during root penetration testing. Item #: SCP-1285 Object Class: Safe Special...
tags: hostile humanoid liquid neurological safe scp sculpture self-replicating toxic transfiguration wooden

+128 31
Latest comment: Soultear at 05 Jun 2019 04:29
Last edited: TSATPWTCOTTTADC at 10 Mar 2020 14:30

Info import sciper.2193.*; import sciper.tu2677.*; public class ego Main { Check out more of my articles here! Part of SCP-2677-1. Item #: SCP-2677 Object Class: Keter (Formerly...
tags: 2000 container electronic foundation-made keter mind-affecting sapient scp sentient the-trashfire

+23 6
Latest comment: stormbreath at 18 Dec 2018 22:33
Last edited: stormbreath at 24 Jul 2020 19:12

Item #: SCP-3428 Object Class: Euclid Special Containment Procedures: Reports regarding the discovery of SCP-3428 are to be investigated immediately, and the instance is to be secured as soon as...
tags: automaton avian engraved euclid hostile omnivorous scp statue

+157 25
Latest comment: UraniumEmpire at 28 Dec 2018 05:45
Last edited: aismallard at 01 Jun 2020 01:49

Info Highway Ash See you soon, mom! Tracklist: Life Imitates the Black Mirror 7:06 Mutual Entombment 4:38 Cross-Contaminated Cat Sausage 2:51 Inscribed on my Blood Vessels 5:05 Bandages Just Give...
tags: auditory cognitohazard intangible keter knowledge memetic mind-affecting musical scp the-trashfire veronica-fitzroy

+14 4
Latest comment: UraniumEmpire at 15 Dec 2018 18:33
Last edited: UraniumEmpire at 28 Apr 2019 04:17

Item #: SCP-3472 Level 2/3472 Object Class: Keter Classified SCP-3472 in its containment area. Special Containment Procedures: SCP-3472-1 has been converted into Containment Area-██....
tags: biohazard building furniture glass indestructible k-class-scenario keter light scp structure

+83 20
Latest comment: fluxman at 06 Jun 2020 13:53
Last edited: UraniumEmpire at 08 Feb 2019 21:19

Info Excerpt from '11 Ways to Spruce Up that Marriage' now, of course, you're gonna want to make sure you don't have any children, unless the child is your problem. In that case, it'll clean...
tags: autonomous document euclid extremity hostile mind-affecting organic ritual scp

+108 31
Latest comment: Melanxolic at 20 May 2020 14:38
Last edited: Rimple at 15 Mar 2020 22:39

Info You're kidding, right? The odd woman sat stoic at her desk. Our statistics are peer reviewed and verified before publication. Now sir, unless you want to continue defending these...
tags: biohazard contagion intangible mathematical probability scp thaumiel

+79 18
Latest comment: pastarasta1 at 11 Sep 2019 18:12
Last edited: UraniumEmpire at 06 Jul 2020 22:15

Info Can you feel it, Yehezkel? Your bones grinding to dust, your mind withering away, your soul trembling in terror? Savor this moment. It means you can feel. Check out more of my articles here!...
tags: antimemetic building entropic geological infohazard keter knowledge location maria-jones memory-affecting meta scp subterranean the-trashfire uncontained vermian

+140 15
Latest comment: GuesssWho at 28 Oct 2019 22:52
Last edited: aismallard at 01 Jun 2020 02:04

Info There was always a thought, however fleeting, that a single weapon could win the war for the Reich; that our glorious engineers could construct the rough beast that doomed the degenerate...
tags: asci autonomous biological computer electronic historical hostile keter mechanical metallic military obskura predictive reviewers-spotlight sapient satellite scp self-repairing telepathic the-trashfire transmission uncontained weapon

+111 14
Latest comment: nicolasgreene at 13 Sep 2020 21:33
Last edited: stormbreath at 21 Apr 2020 19:59

2/3472-J LEVEL 2/3472-J CLASSIFIED Item #: SCP-3472-J Object Class: Safe Special Containment Procedures: SCP-3472-J is to be stored inside a padded locker in the High Value Anomalous Object...
tags: container doctor-cimmerian glass jam-con2019 joke liquid safe scp self-repairing sleep

+89 21
Latest comment: Plaham at 14 Feb 2020 03:39
Last edited: UraniumEmpire at 17 Jun 2019 03:42

Item #: SCP-4690 4/4690 Object Class: Neutralized Classified Special Containment Procedures: Consensus reality regarding the literary work Madame Chrysanthème and its associated adaptations has...
tags: arachnid doctor-cimmerian narrative neutralized scp zyn-kiryu

+120 8
Latest comment: Chiefieboi at 26 Aug 2020 13:10
Last edited: Deadly Bread at 14 Jul 2020 17:07

NOTICE FROM THE FOUNDATION RECORDS AND INFORMATION SECURITY ADMINISTRATION Following the implementation of the Kraken Protocol on 27/06/1963, containment procedures for SCP-378 have been updated....
tags: alive animal arthropod asci doctor-bright empathic hive-mind insect neurological omnivorous parasitic sapient scp sentient telepathic thaumiel the-trashfire unusual-incidents-unit

+95 10
Latest comment: (user deleted) at 12 Aug 2019 00:00
Last edited: DrBleep at 15 Mar 2020 21:07

Threat Level: Yellow Following the regular implementation of Procedure 610-Sinclair, SCP-4495 has achieved sufficient ectoentropic stability, and is no longer considered at risk of instigating an...
tags: animal biological cadaver ectoentropic food furniture hostile humanoid k-class-scenario keter ophidian scp self-repairing the-trashfire

+39 8
Latest comment: wraithgender at 29 Oct 2019 00:57
Last edited: UraniumEmpire at 29 Mar 2020 01:20

Threat Level: Green Special Containment Procedures: The land surrounding SCP-4952 has been purchased by the Foundation from the United States government. Due to the nature of SCP-4952, no further...
tags: doctor-gears humanoid location loop safe sarkic scp sentient thad-xyank vehicle

+115 17
Latest comment: Kersnoodle at 17 Nov 2019 01:04
Last edited: aismallard at 01 Jun 2020 01:53

From: MRoberts4@Scipnet (Agent Macie Roberts, Classification Level Nx-56/4886; Employee Number 4947) To: CStephens6@Scipnet (Director Cian Stephens; Classification Level XF-4; Employee Number 1048)...
tags: euclid humanoid location reproductive scp sexual the-trashfire uncontained vermian

+126 15
Latest comment: Crow-Cat at 07 May 2020 23:31
Last edited: UraniumEmpire at 17 Jun 2020 05:08

Threat Level: Undetermined SCP-5012-1 through -24 c. December 1923. Fiorenza Marcelli is positioned 9th from the left. A section of SCP-5012. Special Containment Procedures: [pending] Legacy...
tags: 5000 aiad arboreal artistic auditory biological broken-masquerade compulsion end-of-death euclid extradimensional food hallucination humanoid instrument location on-mount-golgotha performance plant scp the-trashfire visual

+81 10
Latest comment: Marcelles_Raynes at 24 Mar 2020 12:27
Last edited: UraniumEmpire at 03 Mar 2020 04:45

Threat Level: Yellow Special Containment Procedures: Restaurants in the Middle East/North Africa (MENA) region are to be regularly checked for the presence of SCP-5445, with particular attention paid...
tags: bacteria biohazard exchange keter mind-affecting scp

+66 9
Latest comment: wallycaine at 16 Mar 2020 01:46
Last edited: UraniumEmpire at 12 Mar 2020 22:30

Threat Level: Blue Special Containment Procedures: Antivirus software in use by the Foundation is to be capable of identifying and blocking requests from SCP-5444. Furthermore, all information...
tags: adult automaton autonomous computer electronic euclid humanoid online sapient scp the-trashfire

+84 15
Latest comment: UraniumEmpire at 17 Jun 2020 14:54
Last edited: The Pighead at 23 Jul 2020 09:45

Threat Level: Green Special Containment Procedures: SCP-5499 is to be stored, unpowered, in the ████-██ Equipment Storage Wing. Due to the nature of ████-██'s primary project, transfer of SCP-5499 to...
tags: appliance ectoentropic electronic gustatory jam-con2020 observational omnivorous safe scp

+109 12
Latest comment: Narsil098 at 08 Jun 2020 13:34
Last edited: UraniumEmpire at 19 Sep 2020 00:18

... BEGIN RECORDING Item #: SCP-5994 OlI/5994 Object Class: Safe Classified Threat Level: Undetermined fig 1.1. Still frame from SCP-5994, Configuration 2A, Monitor 2,...
tags: animal building computer electronic furniture loop recording safe scp the-trashfire
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D-7294's Declassified D-Class Survival Guide
+86 11
Latest comment: RockTeethMothEyes at 12 May 2019 05:58
Last edited: SharpEmbrace at 10 Jun 2020 17:20

Info Desk. Magical, grants wishes? Looks fancy. Roommate, transgender felon, claims a fairy lives inside. Crescent shaped hole? Check out more of my articles here! D-952, please...
tags: d-7294 tale the-trashfire veronica-fitzroy

The Last Things Dr. Darryl Loyd Ever Did, in Chronological Order
+86 16
Latest comment: MayD at 11 Sep 2020 02:19
Last edited: UraniumEmpire at 25 Dec 2019 22:48

Info The Wheel of Life turned, and the bearing fell onto the nearest spoke. Check out more of my articles here! Nominated for Best Overall in the 2018 Foundies. With regards to...
tags: tale the-trashfire veronica-fitzroy

Baptism of the Wandering Jew by Johnny the Son
+43 4
Latest comment: LilyTide at 19 Oct 2018 13:21
Last edited: stormbreath at 06 Jun 2020 18:15

Info Cousin Johnny gave Veronica a pat on the back, and Veronica froze up. Jay? J kept their head face down on the desk, but they wouldn't cry. They weren't supposed to. Jay. Austin...
tags: cousin-johnny tale the-trashfire veronica-fitzroy

Degenerate Art
+33 3
Latest comment: Rikjard Regreps at 15 Apr 2019 19:01
Last edited: UraniumEmpire at 07 May 2020 06:23

you will be glad to know, however, that Queen Maven is repulsed by salt, and unable to cross its barrier. Do be warned, however: Queen Maven is still a child of the Unseelie Queen, and there is a...
tags: are-we-cool-yet goi2019 tale the-trashfire

David Cameron Fucked a Dead Pig
+36 4
Latest comment: Genshed at 26 Apr 2019 00:38
Last edited: UraniumEmpire at 25 Dec 2019 22:48

This tale is NSFW. No dead pigs were fucked in the making of this story. Fuzzbutt, the magical cat butt that walked on its own, struggled in Veronica's grasp; this was normal for her, as it was with...
tags: adult tale the-trashfire veronica-fitzroy

Last Minute Resistance
+16 2
Latest comment: Rikjard Regreps at 21 May 2019 10:21
Last edited: UraniumEmpire at 07 May 2020 06:23

Graphic depictions of abuse ahead. Proceed with caution. Alonso Álvaro Andino didn't like Ways, and especially not ones that went too far out. Very especially, Alonso did not enjoy taking several...
tags: are-we-cool-yet goi2019 tale the-trashfire

Beef Albini in Fusion Sauce with a Side of Fruit
+29 2
Latest comment: Genshed at 24 Jun 2019 04:55
Last edited: UraniumEmpire at 10 Jul 2020 22:55

This tale is NSFW. Like, really NSFW. 22-year-old Isabella Kawajiri's fingers bled in and out of barbed tentacles as they idly plucked the strings of her beloved L7 Astrocaster Bass, whispering dull...
tags: adult scarlet-king tale the-trashfire veronica-fitzroy

Nadox and the Mekhanite
+105 9
Latest comment: MalyceGraves at 26 Nov 2019 02:52
Last edited: JackalRelated at 14 Jun 2020 19:44

Credit to Perelka_L. The sun rose, and Nadox wandered. Where to, where from, in days of the Daevites it was a question of importance, a question begged by the still-aching wounds left by bloodied...
tags: broken-god co-authored collab-con2019 daevite sarkic scarlet-king tale the-trashfire

+137 29
Latest comment: Ihp at 01 Sep 2020 05:49
Last edited: Ayumi-san at 13 Sep 2020 12:02

Item #: SCP-166 Level 2/166 Object Class: Keter Classified Threat Level: Black Special Containment Procedures: Due to the nature of SCP-166, all propositions regarding SCP-166 are to be reviewed...
tags: doctor-clef kindness nobody serpents-hand tale the-trashfire

Are We Gentrified Yet?
+159 19
Latest comment: Ihp at 11 Aug 2020 09:02
Last edited: UraniumEmpire at 16 Sep 2020 17:05

From: krd.liamhcrot|ehtrotaruc#krd.liamhcrot|ehtrotaruc To: krd.liamhcrot|citircasydobon#krd.liamhcrot|citircasydobon Subject: I'm at my limit. Date: February 1st, 2018 at 15:31:59 Hey, Critic. Sure...
tags: are-we-cool-yet backdoor-soho broken-god co-authored gamers-against-weed mister prize-feature robert-bumaro sarkic tale the-trashfire

The Foundation Learns Nothing About Clowns
+22 4
Latest comment: DarkStuff at 29 Dec 2019 20:08
Last edited: UraniumEmpire at 27 Mar 2020 05:48

Okay, Clown anatomy, capital C, that's where it gets really weird. I mean I can give you the footnotes, sure, but Fuller didn't exactly run seminars on Clown biology. He didn't run seminars period,...
tags: art-exchange herman-fuller tale

Filled To The Brim With Girlish Glee
+76 19
Latest comment: weizhong at 02 Aug 2020 08:16
Last edited: UraniumEmpire at 20 Sep 2020 20:06

Graphic depictions of abuse ahead. Proceed with caution. #JGT_GeneralChat #JGT_2point0 PINK FLY PM #JGT_GeneralChat KeeLee PM PINK FLY PM JGTBot PM #JGT_GeneralChat #JGT_2point0 PINK FLY PM...
tags: tale the-trashfire

+14 3
Latest comment: RockTeethMothEyes at 01 May 2020 07:08
Last edited: UraniumEmpire at 30 Aug 2020 00:04

Bastian Schaus's well, everything hurt. The sight of Acolyte Dunst bursting into his sickroom inspired surprisingly little to offset that. Well, look at you. Today, Dunst wore a polka-dotted dress,...
tags: tale the-trashfire

Scooby Doo, I Wanna Be Like You
+18 3
Latest comment: SharpEmbrace at 30 May 2020 21:32
Last edited: UraniumEmpire at 30 May 2020 20:17

Agent Adrian Andrews struggled against his bonds. The bonds were metal, of course, and also powered by a sturdy system of fuck-off hyrdraulics, but what sort of agent would he be if he didn’t put up a...
tags: mr-fish tale

Ess, Why, Dee
+21 3
Latest comment: A Random Day at 10 Jul 2020 23:30
Last edited: UraniumEmpire at 15 Sep 2020 16:22

This tale is NSFW. Sara Yarkoni gave one last glance over her bucket list. "scout the town" "make new friends" "learn some magic" "break a magic law" "get in a fight" "drink something funny"...
tags: adult backdoor-soho reclamation tale the-trashfire veronica-fitzroy

A Cloud Over Lichtenberg
+13 1
Latest comment: UraniumEmpire at 29 Aug 2020 23:19
Last edited: UraniumEmpire at 21 Sep 2020 05:33

RECEIPT OF INTERNAL EXCHANGE ON BEHALF OF THE BENEFICIARY, Acolyte Dunst €400 has been provided to cover the costs of summoning and binding a Gehennian entity €30.000 has been provided to develop an...
tags: are-we-cool-yet tale the-trashfire

GoI Formats

Ambrose Backdoor Soho
+81 7
Latest comment: DrScaramouche at 26 Feb 2020 21:13
Last edited: UraniumEmpire at 16 Sep 2020 17:05

Ambrose BackDoor SoHo: Grand Opening! Fine Art and Fine Dining In association with the BackDoor Soho Artistic Associates, Marshall Carter Dark LLC., and the King of Hearts art collective, Ambrose...
tags: ambrose-restaurant backdoor-soho gamers-against-weed goi-format marshall-carter-and-dark mister reviewers-spotlight the-trashfire

jacklyn diamandis, accountable to nobody
+24 2
Latest comment: loddite at 13 Mar 2020 04:29
Last edited: UraniumEmpire at 04 Mar 2020 23:06

June 8th, 1973 Jacklyn Diamandis. Jacklyn Scorpio Diamandis. It rolls off my tongue like shit. If ever the most succinct counterpoint to Daevon's rule walked the earth, it'd be the Covenants. Only...
tags: daevite goi-format nobody the-trashfire

Herman Fuller Presents: Eucestodiel, the Pallid Godhead
+48 2
Latest comment: Niziah Sanchez at 09 Mar 2020 19:32
Last edited: Elogee FishTruck at 26 Mar 2020 21:12

Triumph of the Worm! Once a lowly worm, now a god: Eucestodiel is ten feet of Holy Wrath, 256 legs of pure divinity, and a one-worm showstopper! See the Worm's final triumph,...
tags: dread&circuses goi-format herman-fuller jam-con2020


Uraniumempire's Personnel File
+47 2
Latest comment: Uncle Nicolini at 30 Sep 2018 00:29
Last edited: Ayumi-san at 15 Sep 2020 00:41

... Before I go Post an Apollyon and Explained Codify Izzy's connection to Jude Codify all three Irises as trans Make Nadox and Derdekeas's relationship better defined...
tags: author collaboration

When Will You Die for the Last Time in My Dreams - Hub
+42 5
Latest comment: UraniumEmpire at 04 Apr 2020 20:08
Last edited: UraniumEmpire at 20 Aug 2020 19:26

but people like you, you’re just blinded by you own self hate and everybody’s rooting for you when will you listen up or just keep writing me off, writing me off, you just keep writing me off~Pool...
tags: backdoor-soho hub the-trashfire veronica-fitzroy

Young and Under 30 Reboot Workbench
Latest comment: at
Last edited: UraniumEmpire at 26 Sep 2020 18:59

« September 2020 | October 2020 | November 2020 » Featured SCP! SCP-3687: Anti-Entropy Doorknobs A note inside of a fireproof lock-box was discovered in Mr. Hannigan's bedroom, reading: ...
tags: workbench

The Trashfire
+53 5
Latest comment: The Pighead at 04 Dec 2019 18:57
Last edited: UraniumEmpire at 30 Aug 2020 17:40

The Trashfire The Stories (in rough chronological order) Unsteady Foundations Empty Husks Broken Hearts Iron Works Stories about the Foundation trying its best. SCP-3721: Obsolete Weapons...
tags: hub the-trashfire

Underread and Underrated February 2020
Latest comment: at
Last edited: UraniumEmpire at 01 Feb 2020 04:56

February 2020 | March 2020 » Featured SCP! SCP-281-FR: The Day The Earth Stopped Being Flat THANK YOU FOR NOT TOUCHING THE SWORDS Featured SCP. Featured Tale/Format! Carnifex Carl ...
tags: news

Underread and Underrated March 2020
+10 1
Latest comment: Lt Flops at 01 Mar 2020 16:27
Last edited: UraniumEmpire at 01 Mar 2020 00:28

« February 2020| March 2020 | April 2020 » Featured SCP! SCP-4860: Concrete Building SCP-4860 designates a sprawling concrete structure of indeterminate origin and purpose situated within...
tags: news

Underread and Underrated April 2020
Latest comment: at
Last edited: UraniumEmpire at 01 Apr 2020 04:10

« March 2020| April 2020 | May 2020 » Featured SCP! SCP-4676: The Consequence of Unwanted Isolation or Gratuitous Seclusion SCP-4676 is a phenomenon that causes the sudden inhibition of...
tags: news

Underread and Underrated May 2020
Latest comment: at
Last edited: UraniumEmpire at 01 May 2020 04:11

« April 2020| May 2020 | June 2020 » Featured SCP! SCP-5656: DEEPWATER DOWNWELL Welcome back, Tamara Otten. Today is February 2, 2073.' Featured SCP. Featured Tale/Format! et...
tags: news

Black and White and Red All Over - Hub
+20 3
Latest comment: DrHeadlong at 10 May 2020 10:24
Last edited: UraniumEmpire at 07 May 2020 06:24

ATTENTION Artists, sculptors, hacks and frauds, come one, come all, come along but goddammit, come! See Sind Wir Jetzt Cool Lichtenberg, the dirt-caked underdogs of Outer Lichtenberg, fight for their...
tags: are-we-cool-yet hub the-trashfire

Underread and Underrated June 2020
+8 1
Latest comment: UraniumEmpire at 02 Jun 2020 17:55
Last edited: Lt Flops at 02 Jun 2020 19:10

« May 2020 | June 2020 | July 2020 » Featured SCP! SCP-3638: You Can't Be Serious! SCP-3638 is a two-meters tall, partially incorporeal, remarkably impotent predatory entity. Featured...
tags: news

Underread and Underrated July 2020
+8 1
Latest comment: A Random Day at 04 Jul 2020 18:17
Last edited: UraniumEmpire at 04 Jul 2020 17:18

« June 2020 | July 2020 | August 2020 » Featured SCP! SCP-5710: The Bach-Werke-Verzeichnis SCP-5710 is a Schnitger pipe organ used by Johann Sebastian Bach before being transported by German...
tags: news

Underread and Underrated September 2020
Latest comment: at
Last edited: UraniumEmpire at 01 Sep 2020 21:10

« August 2020 | September 2020 | October 2020 » Featured SCP! SCP-1039: The Gathering Doll The head of SCP-1039 has been known to turn towards agents within the containment cell, independent of...
tags: news


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